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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29288199">The Bastet and the Finch</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/sushishin/pseuds/sushishin'>sushishin</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Camelove 2021: Gillventures [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Merlin (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Canon Era, Don't Worry About It, F/M, Hopeful Ending, Inspired by Ladyhawke (1985), It seems to have come out in an angsty way, Light Angst, is this angst?, which I actually haven't seen</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 05:41:39</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>944</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29288199</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/sushishin/pseuds/sushishin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>They had not always been like this. </i>
</p><p>The sun sets, and Freya is transformed into a monster. The sun rises, and she is human again... but Gilli is not.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Freya/Gilli (Merlin)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Camelove 2021: Gillventures [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2150928</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Camelove 2021</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Bastet and the Finch</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Written for Camelove 2021 - Day 1: Ladies First</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>They had not always been like this. </p><p>It seems a millennia ago since Freya had seen the moon, the stars, or the face of her beloved. How long has it been, really - only three years? The rest of her life stretches in front of her: days on her own, but <em>not</em> <em>quite</em>, and nights full of an impotent, murderous rage. It is no life, but they stagger on anyway.</p><p>She had considered leaving him, before, when the curse was new, when they were still snarling and snapping at each other - <em> why are you still here? I’m a monster - </em>and she is so glad, now, that she did not. Freya knows that Gilli will not think of leaving her, no matter what happens. She reaches up to her shoulder, where a goldfinch nestles. “Not long now,” she murmurs, smoothing a finger down his back. </p><p>The sun is low on the horizon: she had better start preparing for the evening. Freya walks deeper into the forest, where the trees block the sun, and most importantly: where there is no path or trail. The terrible things that might happen if she were to be found… her mind shies away from the thought. Freya walks some more. </p><p>She finds a suitable tree at the edge of a small clearing. It’s best if there’s not too much around herself, and there will be room for Gilli to have a fire. She sets her bag down at the other end of the clearing, and pulls out the chains and rope. </p><p>Tying herself up is not easy, no matter that she does this every night. There’s always the thought that this will be the night she leaves it too loose for the bastet, and it breaks free - she doesn’t want to test her control, if she even has any. Maybe the animal in her would recognise Gilli. Maybe. She knows he bears scars, from one of the first few nights, though she has never seen them. He had not wanted to tell her about them but she had seen the jar of ointment: his magic had not yet been strong, then. </p><p>Waiting is always the most difficult part. The goldfinch flutters about her face, landing in her hair, then fluttering about again. “I hope you like the surprise,” she says. She’s tucked a small wedge of sharp cheese in with the bread, and her note has a joke that she had overheard in the tavern. She listens to the rustle of leaves in the breeze, then breathes in, and breathes out. She can’t see the sun from here - it’s not long now.  </p><p>Sunset comes, and with it, the feeling of pins pricking her skin, all over her body. Freya raises her head and seeks out the goldfinch, which has settled in the grass in front of her, barely five steps away. His form blurs. She must not look away - one of these nights, she might get just a glimpse of his dear, dear, face - then there is <em> pain</em>, and the bastet takes her over. </p><p>The night passes her by in a haze; what memories she has, are like dreams: her wings crushed against her back; <em> hunger</em>, the smell of something utterly delicious, frustratingly close but just out of reach; cold chains chafing against her fur; clawing uselessly at the grass. </p><p>She blinks, then it is dawn. The chains and rope are loose about her, and a goldfinch sits at her feet, just a bit too close. Freya slips her hands out of her chains and lets him settle in her palm; caresses his feathers and closes her eyes. </p><p>When Freya opens her eyes again, the sun is much higher in the sky. She winds the chains and rope up neatly, and walks slowly back to the bag. Gilli has left a letter for her, and unexpectedly, some of the cheese. She smiles. “Such generosity, saving me some of the cheese I bought,” she says, and the goldfinch chirps. She unfolds the note, traces his carefully shaped letters with a finger. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Freya,  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> That poor donkey! Though it reminds me of Eva.. Do you remember the time with the carrots?  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> And thank you for the cheese, I have missed it.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> It’s not too cold. I’ve spent some time practicing my summoning as well. Though it still needs some work: I tried to go for the waterskin and almost ended up spilling it all.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> You seemed restless, tonight. It still pains me to see you all chained up like that. I know, I know, there’s no other way… and it’s impossible, but one day, I want to see you fly.  </em>
</p><p><em> I think we may finally be close to a settlement of druids</em>. <em>Maybe they may have the answer to our problem? Maybe they will not be able to cure us completely, I do not want to get my hopes up too much, but maybe we could transform together someday.... </em></p><p>
  <em> Yours, always, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Gilli </em>
</p><p> </p><p>She rereads it until her eyes blur with tears.</p><p>For the past few years, she had thought that this was their fate to bear - and <em> curse </em> the sorceress who had decided this was suitable retribution for what she had done to defend herself. It had been an accident, and anyway… Gilli had not been there. He would still be normal - as normal as a sorcerer would be in Uther’s kingdom, at any rate. But these are old thoughts, and she is used to putting them aside. </p><p>Perhaps it would not be long until this ordeal was over. It had been enough to know that she was not facing this alone… but now? Something akin to hope flickers to life in her heart.</p>
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